Note: The points in this article are in no way meant to be offensive to or directed at engaged Auburn students. The article is simply intended to pass humor at a classic Auburn University stereotype.
With graduation season around the corner it’s time to be on the lookout for every senior Auburn woman’s favorite accessory - no, no, not the new David Yurman bracelet. I’m talking about that ring all the ladies are rocking on that ‘oh-so-special’ finger.
Since my freshman year, I’ve been aware of Auburn’s ring by spring stereotype. It’s not necessarily a written rule or tradition that female students are engaged by the time flowers are blooming, but, as a senior with a Facebook timeline full of engagement photos, it certainly feels like it sometimes. While I am certainly happy for all my engaged ladies, I am also happy for all my single ladies (Image obtained from Auburn University Weddings at Samford Park).
Yeah, you may not be rocking a 10K diamond or planning a wedding on Samford Lawn, but here are 10 reasons why that’s completely ok -
1. Two words: in-laws.
You can barely make your own mother happy, much less a second one. You thought meeting the parents was stressful? Well, get excited, you have a long line of birthdays, holidays and dinners that will make that original meeting seem like a treat. Start working now, you want your fiance’s mother to like you and there aren’t enough baked goods in the world to convince her you’re worthy of her precious son. Of course, your in-laws could turn into your new best friends… Go for that route.
2. Domesticity isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Your roommate knows you can’t cook and clean, but that fiance? Oh, he’s been fooled. Every time you “cooked” him dinner, (aka bought a rotisserie chicken at Publix and magically pulled it out of the oven as he walked in), you built up his expectations. With no ring on your finger, you still have time to learn how to perfect a pie crust and how to actually cook a real meal.
Jokes, who are you kidding, take-out will always be the way to go.
3. You don’t have to make one of the most important wedding decisions - choosing bridesmaids.
Like, can your whole pledge class be bridesmaids? And of course his p-bros should be in the wedding party too! Ok, that’s all in good humor, but you’ve had the last four years to stretch your social butterfly wings. With friends in so many different groups, how on earth do you decide who stands beside you on your wedding day? Just wait until you’re 30 and buy matching collars for all your feline bridesmaids… those are your true friends after all.
4. Having qualms about a boyfriend? It’s not like you promised him life or anything.
That ring on the left hand is more than something nice to look at. It’s the ultimate promise. The, “you’re the one I’m sticking with and this is serious,” promise. Maybe you’re not single and kind of hoped your boyfriend would propose.
Girl, be thankful! You still have time to decide if he’s the one after you’re out of the Auburn bubble. Even more you don’t have to give back a piece of jewelry more expensive than your car if you break up.
5. Speaking of moving, you have time to travel. That’s right, the world is your playground.
Want to jet off to Anguilla? Or, hey, maybe you’ll go to New Zealand! The only person you have to please is yourself, and we all know solo trips are the best kinds of trips. Purchase your passport and start saving because that entry-level salary may not be able to keep up… but you can dream right? And it’s the fact that you can travel that counts!
6. You have time to be a strong career woman.
It’s time to be the better version of Leslie Knope or Olivia Pope. Whether you’re moving to a big city or taking a job in a small town, it’s time to own it. You don’t need a man on your arm because you have your long list of to-dos in one hand and cappuccino in the other. Are the “30 Under 30” lists ready, because you’re about to be in the number one spot.
7. Name changes are a pain.
It’s been 22 good years and now you have to give up your last name? Yeah, no thanks. Think about all those monograms you’ll have to replace. Or, how about dealing with the Department of Motor Vehicles to get a new driver license? Social Security? Insurance? Car titles? Yeah, the list goes on. The process of getting your name changed may end up taking longer than the actual engagement. Think of all your dear engaged friends, not only do they have to make white the new black, but they have to deal with this long and tedious process.
8. You have time to find yourself.
People asking you what you’re doing after graduation makes you want to hyperventilate. Yet, you want to make the decision of who you’re spending the rest of your life with? Whew, pass the brown paper bag. With no fiance in tow, you’re able to move where you like, do what you like and be who you like. You barely recognize the person you were freshman year. Who even knows what you’ll be like in four more years?!
Freedom doesn’t come free, and, hey, maybe you do sometimes wonder what it’d be like to have an official partner in crime when you look at friends’ engagement photos. As fun as that sounds, you’re a strong independent woman and you’re just getting out from under your parents’ wings. You’re financially independent and a strong career woman. No one calls the shots, but you! You even have freedom in the small things. When it’s just you there’s no one to have to compromise what to watch on Netflix. You are a beautiful tropical fish and you can swim whatever direction you like!
10. Because at the end of the day, no one treats you better than you.
When’s the last time you got on your own nerves? Well you’re fabulous so never of course! As wonderful as any man will treat you, you’ve had more practice. With more than 20 years under your belt, you’ve worked out the kinks and know exactly how to make yourself happy. Here’s to another ten years of providing for yourself well!
(Photo obtained from Tumblr)
Utmost respect to the engaged ladies, they go through much more than meets the eye. Now you see, however, that while the grass may seem greener on the other side, being without that coveted ring isn’t so bad.
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